Communication

Communication is so important in any relationship! There are three main parts to communication, they are the words, the tone, and the non-verbal cues. The words contribute to about 14% of communication, tone is about 35%, and non-verbal cues are about 51%. Communication nowadays can get complicated because a lot of people communicate through cell phones, or online. When you communicate through calling, you’re losing 51% of your communication because you lose the non-verbal cues. When you communicate through texting or online messaging, you’re losing 86% of your communication because you’re losing tone and non-verbal cues. These forms of communication are nice and convenient, but I think that it is important to keep in mind what you lose when you communicate this way. I think that if you want to keep a relationship strong that it is important to interact and communicate face to face. 

Sarcasm is a large part of people’s personalities these days. I think it is important to recognize when it is and when it is not appropriate to use. Sarcasm is a corrupt type of communication. Sarcasm is often used to be rude or funny. I think that in relationships with a significant other, it’s important to know when it will and when it won’t be offensive. I think that it becomes easy to use it as a defense mechanism, but when it is used that way, it often offends the other person. Sarcasm can be fun and light-hearted, but it’s important to recognize when you push the line.

Being able to make decisions as a couple can be difficult. It is important to learn how to do this effectively. Decision making is a big part of a relationship at any stage. In the dating stage it is more about making decisions individually. These are also going to be smaller decisions, such as what to do on a date, or what to wear. They can seem difficult sometimes, but in the big scheme of things don’t really matter that much. Making decisions in the courtship stage is bigger than making decisions in the dating stage. These decisions are more about whether or not to date seriously, or whether or not you can see marrying each other. These can be big decisions, but they aren’t as definite as some decision in the engagement or marriage stages. In the engagement stage you started to make a lot of decisions, big and small. In this stage you start to plan for your wedding, but more importantly you should be planning for your marriage. Making decisions for your wedding can be exhausting because it can feel like there is so much to do, but I think that this is a good little trial for your marriage. I think that if you get too stressed out and disagree more than you can agree or compromise, you need to learn how to communicate and make decisions as a couple better. There are also a lot of decisions to be made about how you want your marriage to work. There are a lot of questions about kids, or work, or money that can feel intimidating, and are important to talk about. In the marriage stage these are important things to continue to discuss. There are decisions that you make everyday in a marriage, even if they are small. It is important to be able to communicate well, and let each other know what you expect from each other and what you can do to work effectively together.

Having a family counsel can be an important to keeping your relationships strong. These can vary in who participates in them, it could be parent’s and their children, one parent and one child, only parents, or if there are no kids, just spouses. In The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles and the First Presidency of the Church meet together each week to counsel together. I think that they set a good example of how counsels should be. They have a set time each week that has been set on Thursdays. They set it this day because it is most convenient for everyone. They also have an agenda that everyone gets beforehand so that they can be prepared for what they will be discussing. They also meet in the Temple for the church to invite the Spirit as much as they can, this step can be a more difficult thing for just a family counsel. When they start their counsel, they start by greeting each other and all expressing their love and appreciation for each other, then they pray to invite the Spirit, then they discuss until there is a consensus, not a compromise, then after they have discussed all the topics on the agenda they end with a prayer and a refreshment! I think that this is a good thing to follow in our family counsels!